I don't know about you, but when I first discovered the "Generic Flame Letter"
it quickly became indispensible. Well, the Internet has changed considerably in
recent years; and I think it's pretty safe to say that even the more annoying
netiziens receive much more spam than flame these days. With this in mind,
dev/null is proud to announce...|
The Generic Spam Letter
SUBJECT: HERE IS THE INFORMATION YOU REQUESTED...
XXX!! BE RICH, THIN, AND SEXY AND WATCH CABLE TV FOR
FREE - FREE - FREE AT HOME ALL-NUDE TODAY... WHILE-U-SLEEP!!!!!
We have an offer so NEW, so UNBEATABLE and ABSOLUTELY GUARANTEED TO WORK
that we KNEW you would want to hear about it RIGHT AWAY. Don't miss out!!
This limited time offer is available only to the SELECT FEW who receive
You are receiving this e-mail because in-depth market research shows that
other people JUST LIKE YOU are CLEARLY interested in our amazing product!!
Our sophisticated market analysis has determined that you should receive
this e-mail because you: (check any two)
___ Are human.
___ Are a computer autoresponding to all e-mail sent.
___ Are listed in the Internic whois database as a domain registrant.
___ Have an e-mail address.
So, what is this AMAZING OPPORTUNITY? It couldn't be better:
(check one or more)
___ Boost your web traffic overnight!
___ Submit your web site to over 3,000,000 major search engines!
___ Host your web site for only $20 a month!
___ See, hear and smell the hottest, sexee nude teens!
___ Experience the finest hardcore anal porn. All gender and species -
BONUS free sample attached to this message!
___ Purchase over 1.2 billion e-mail addresses on CD-ROM - your
personal e-mail address included!!!
___ Receive QUALITY dental care over the web.
___ Master the secrets of the stock exchange!
___ Sell real estate now!
___ Get rich quick assembling products at home!
___ Work from home - make millions!
___ Retire at 35! No selling!! Proven track record of success!
___ Order Viagra, Ritalin, Rogain, Roofies, Prozac and other
prescription drugs anonymously by mail!
___ Purchase our hi-quality premium-channel cable descramblers!
___ Build your own premium-channel cable descrambler!
[For legal, educational purposes only.]
___ Purchase your next home or vehicle for as little as $1
at government-seized property auctions!
___ Lose 40 pounds in 40 days - only $40!!
___ All natural, not a pill! Our exclusive herbal formula will help you:
(mark only if above checked)
___ fight depression.
___ lose weight while you sleep.
___ increase alertness.
___ grow hair.
___ become more virile.
___ attract a mate with the power of pheromones.
___ Improve your memory with subliminal hypnosis by audiobook.
___ Make money with your computer just by sending e-mail!!!!!
Don't wait to enjoy the rewards! To find out more, call our 24-hour
recording TOLL FREE at 1-888-[INSERT PHONE HERE], or visit our website
at http://www.[INSERT DOMAIN HERE].com.
Thank you, and have a GREAT DAY!!
While we KNOW you wouldn't want to miss this INCREDIBLE OPPORTUNITY, our
service provider could (but probably won't) cancel our account if we
continue to annoy people. If for some INSANE reason you want to miss
the DEAL OF THE CENTURY, simply let us know and we will not bother
you again - today.
If you would like to be removed from this list, please:
(check all that apply)
___ Reply to this e-mail with the word REMOVE in the subject line,
but NOT in the body of the message.
___ Reply to this e-mail with the word REMOVE in the body, but NOT
the subject line.
___ Reply to this e-mail with the word REMOVE in the subject, the
word STOP in the body, and your e-mail address as ours.
___ Fill in the form below, mail it to a different address and state
that you wish to be removed. That address is 1,2323,email@example.com.
___ Visit our web site and fill in the removal form. Then wait for the
___ Call our answering machine, and leave your e-mail address at the tone.
The number is 1-900-555-SMILE.
___ This is a one time mailing. You will not receive mail from us again.
___ This is a one time mailing. You will receive at least three more copies.
___ This is a one time mailing. You will receive at least ten more copies.
___ We have no intention to remove you from our list. Sending a message
requesting removal will verify that your address is correct.
___ Change your e-mail address.