8. The Mexican/Asarian War
[The following were posted on Today's Computers' "Gutbusters" board. --Kiwi]
Numb: 1
Title:Mexican...
From: ASARIAN
Date: 08-26-85
What do you call a Mexican with no arms or legs???
----------------------------------------------------
Trust worthy!!!!!
Sorry if I offended anyone...
<<< Asarian >>>
Numb: 2
Title:Offense & Defense
From: anonymous
Date: 08-26-85
I imagine you expected somebody to be offended by your joke, otherwise why
would you have built a fortress around yourself that is THREE ANGLE BRACKETS
thick? Not even a Mexican with a punctuation nuke could get through that kind
of armor!
--Kiwi
P.S. Don't waste your breath, Rene Magritte fans!
Numb: 3
Title:Defense...
From: anonymous
Date: 08-27-85
Listen, I don't want to get into a big
battle or nothing, but I would like to
know who I offended??? Or are you
too ashamed...
Asarian
Ps:Look no defense...
Numb: 4
Title:Aargh!
From: anonymous
Date: 08-27-85
That was just a little joke--this is supposed to be the joke board, isn't it?
And I did sign my handle...
--Kiwi
P.S. Oh no! You should've kept your guard up! Now some Mexican might come
along and stick a "|" through your "A" or put a "~" on your "n"! Duck!
Quick!
P.P.S. Don't waste your breath, people who can't display the whole ASCII
character set!
Numb: 5
Title:There is no such handle...
From: ASARIAN
Date: 08-27-85
When did you log onto this board???? The last time
I checked the user listing there was no such handle
as "Kiwi"...
<<< Asarian >>>
PS:My defenses are re-instated...
Numb: 6
Title:Wait!
From: anonymous
Date: 08-27-85
Here, Asarian, before you go out there...Put this on. I know it's heavy and
bulky, but it should offer much better protection that what you've got on now.
///=======\\\
<<< >>>
\\\=======///
--Kiwi
P.S. The zipper's in the back.
Numb: 7
Title:Oh No!
From: anonymous
Date: 08-27-85
Here they come! A gang of Mexicans brandishing vertical bar/circuflex
spears, and other hideous engines of war! Everybody RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!
^
| ^
| ^ |
| /| |
| <(-|-
\| (A bow and angle-bracket)
//////
\\\\\\ ---
////// (A phalanx | |
\\\\\\ of drunken | | ~
pikemen) o|-|o ~~~ (A tilde-cannon with a pile of ammo)
~~~~~
# (A tic-tac-toe board, on which Mexicans plan strategy)
{*} (An anti-matter bomb encased in a magnetic field)
--Kiwi (an apteryx wielding a +5 bill)
Numb: 8
Title:Ok ok...
From: ASARIAN
Date: 08-29-85
So I'll put on my extra shielding--courtesy of Kiwi...
///=======\\\
<<< Asarian >>>
\\\=======///
Numb: 9
Title:Bad news...
From: anonymous
Date: 08-30-85
I am sorry to say this, everybody, but my display makes relatively small angle
brackets. While I was reading the last post, the Mexicans took advantage of
that fact and shot a period through the gap at 1700 fps. It hit Asarian right
in the 'i'. What can I say? My recklessness has caused the demise of one of
this board's greatest users. I'm sorry.
Krill
Numb: 10
Title:Bye Bye Joke board
From: ARTHUR DENT
Date: 09-01-85
This is now a blither board! Blither
conquers all!
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
@@Bryan Hannahs @@
@@(aka Arthur Dent) @@
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
No bean's gettin' through that line 'o
shielding!!!!!
Numb: 11
Title:Not quite!
From: anonymous
Date: 09-01-85
I wouldn't be too sure of that Arthur aka Bryan. If you get me too pissed-off
at you, I'll burn a new character EPROM for myself that displays '@' as ' ',
and then invite a bunch of Mexican friends over. So watch your step. Remember
what happened to dear Asarian?
Krill
dba
The King of Blither
Numb: 12
Title:Not quite dead...
From: ASARIAN
Date: 09-01-85
Boy, you guys are real friends--you just kind'a write
me off for dead...Thanks a lot Sulu--you're real nice
guy...But I have beaten off the Mexican attack and have
put up some new defenses...Krill, PLEASE don't let them
get me, PLEASE...
******************
{{{ Asarian }}}}}}}
********************
PS:It's a little weak on the left side but I think it will
hold...
Numb: 13
Title:Well... mortally wounded?
From: anonymous
Date: 09-02-85
Okay, why didn't you tell me that you had a Second Chance vest? You were
pretty lucky to have survived that attack. Don't worry, I won't let it happen
again. Your defenses are pretty good, this time. Although there are huge gaps
between the astrisks and the curly braces, there is no line of sight through
the gaps to you. So they can't use direct-fire weapons, and they can't use
grenades, because the gaps at the bottom act as a sort of grenade trap. So it
looks like you're safe. What if they use nerve gas, though? No, Mexicans
aren't smart enough to figure that out. But wait! What if they are reading
this? Me and my big mouth! Hmmmm... I don't see them anywhere. But they're
rather crafty. They're probably hiding somewhere reading every word I write.
OH, NO!!! There they are! Up there between the "No," and the "aren't"! Arghs!
I've let them in! Run! Run, Asarian! You can escape while I try to edit them
out. PANIC!!! PANIC!!! THE MEXICANS ARE COMING! THE MEXICANS ARE COMING! Damn
it! I just let two more in! And big ones, at that. And now they're mad at me
for saying that they aren't smart enough to use gas. Ack! I've forgotten the
editing commands! AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!
EEEEEEEOW! OOOOOOOF!!! EEEEEFFF! AYEEEEEE!
lr
iK-l
Numb: 14
Title:Well...
From: anonymous
Date: 09-03-85
Well, I guess I could burn an EPROM that is nothing but zeros. That way
everything would be displayed as a space. Then no defense could protect you.
But then you would be displayed as spaces, also. Hey! Now that's not a bad
idea! Or it would be easier, and have the same effect, if I just turned
my monitor off. My God! What power! I can kill Bryan aka Arthur with the flick
of a switch! What do you say, everybody? Should I do it?
Kr#ll
P.S. It looks like I'll have to wear that bandage for a while. Those Mexicans
gave me a black 'i'.
[And the rest of the Mexican/Letter/etc. wars were fought on C.O.M.P.U.T.E...
--Kiwi]
Numb : 15
Title: Whew!
From : KRILL
Date : 09-03-85
Time : 04;14
I just barely made it back from Today's Computers BBS alive. If any of you go
to board eight on that system, be very careful of what you say about the
Mexi - whoops! I almost let them loose on this board! - well, you know who I
mean. There are several of them running loose, prying through people's armour,
and doing horrible things in general. They attacked me, giving me a black 'i'.
I've taken the bandage off now, so anybody who prefers not to see fresh
wounds should hit the spacebar immediately.
Kr ll
Numb : 16
Title: sheep
From : CAPTAIN SULU
Date : 09-13-85
Time : 10;56
They don't fly so much as they
plummit!
Thump! "Baa" Thump! "BAAAA" Thud!
Numb : 17
Title: Captain
From : KRILL
Date : 09-12-85
Time : 22;11
Well, Captain, I would make up a "Oh, I'm a , and I'm okay" song
about you, but unfortunately your name has four syllables. Do you have a
three syllable aka?
Kr#ll
dba
The King of Blither
P.S. My 'i' would be healed by now - those Mexicans didn't hit it that hard -
but getting that asterisk lodged in my 'i' on B15 slowed down the healing.
Well, at least I didn't get a piece of brain lodged in my head, that would
have been horrible.
Numb : 18
Title: EEEEaaaaarrrrrgggghhhhhhh!!!!!
From : ARTHUR DENT
Date : 09-13-85
Time : 19;16
Now look what you've done, Krill!
You've let them loose here!!!!
Heeeelllllppppppppp!!!!!!
Run!!!!!!!!
ERYERYREWUREUERuerbiuejb$#yerbu%$uertbu
rr4%T5t4%T64u%Rtu&$u&%u$%tRTurTe7u56rti
eryewrye Bryan Hannahs $%'djetrretUeruR
Eweyweyye (aka Arthur Dent) ERyery56$'%
ERyrewry547efdu&(fdhrtuduerbuTREbufgjut
rrrtyuterteryiuertyiuertiutehryuierbhuy
Numb : 19
Title: Ooops!
From : KRILL
Date : 09-14-85
Time : 03;34
Gosh and golly gee, Bryan! Well, jab me with a pointed stick! I sure did,
didn't I? And without even realizing it! Those Mexi -- uhhhh... nameless ones
sure are crafty, aren't they? Fortunately, I don't think they are after me
anymore. They said something about getting that bird-brained apteryx for
insulting their strategic planning method. It's a good thing that Kiwi is
staying away from this board, for he would be in grave danger, were he to
return.
Krill
P.S. Thanks for healing me in that last post.
Numb : 20
Title: Where am I?
From : KRILL
Date : 09-19-85
Time : 08;14
I just burrowed over here from B30. I'm digging around looking for Gumby
Theatre and I keep running into a rabbit and a duck looking for Pismo Beach.
Let's see... Ahhh! I recognize that post over there. This must be B18. Hey
Computist, why don't you put more direction signs down there? I kept getting
lost. And could you put a signal-gate in front of the R/W head? It almost
killed me! Oh well... back down I go...
Numb : 21
Title: Where am I????
From : BLUE ADEPT
Date : 09-22-85
Time : 18;53
This is the darndest board I ever
encountered. The first thing I saw
when I got here was some guy
tunneling around looking for a grail
or something, and talking about
running into a rabbit and a duck.
I feel completely at home here. Hope
the gumbies show up soon.
Numb : 22
Title: Grails
From : KRILL
Date : 09-23-85
Time : 04;04
Actually, Blue, I wasn't looking for the Grail. I was looking for a missing
board called Gumby Theatre. It is sort of a high-class blither board where
people don't post messages without spaces. But now that you mention it, I did
see a Holy Grail down there, but I didn't bother taking it because, you see,
I've already got one. It's very nice...
Hey Computist, did you know that the guards around your password file are so
stupid that they think that if you can't see them, they can't see you! I just
thought that I'd point that out before somebody like Arthur Dent goes down
there and looks at all the passwords.
Krill
Numb : 23
Title: FEAR Spell
From : KIWI
Date : 09-26-85
Time : 00;26
Thank you Hercules for waking me and temporarily making me a real player again
instead of an NPC.
In that case, I agree: let's stay out of the way of whatever horrible
apparition that was and go back to sleep.
By the way, are puns allowed? And if so, why not limericks? Limericks are a
great way to tickle one's Melnibone! (Boo! Hiss! Groan!)
Until The Metallion gives me my character info, I'm back to being a sleeping
NPC...
--Kiwi
Numb : 24
Title: ???
From : KRILL
Date : 09-26-85
Time : 04;39
Kiwi, that last post totally... K#w# Heh, heh, heh. Now that his 'i's are
covered, I can insult him without him ever catching on that something is
amiss.
Hey, Apteryx-breath! You sneak into your closet at night and listen to Dire
Straits!
Heh, heh, heh... Now I remove the bandages, and he will never know what hit
him! Kiwi
... confused me. What was it refering to? Are
you replying to something 50 posts ago? I don't think that Mr. Herc has posted
on this board in quite a while.
Krill
P.S. Aren't you all getting damned sick of these 'i' puns? Well, you should
be!
P.P.S. Kiwi, that P.S. refered to nothing in particular. Nothing at all.
Really!
P.P.P.S. Hmmmm... Don't kiwis rely more on smell than sight? I wonder if kiwis
can smell insults?
P.P.P.P.S. Ignore that, Kiwi, it was just something that popped into my mind
untriggered. Honest!
Numb : 25
Title: K-w-
From : ARTHUR DENT
Date : 09-26-85
Time : 08;22
I love super glue.
Bryan Hannahs
(aka Arthur Dent)
Numb : 26
Title: GLUE & YOU
From : BELBOZ
Date : 09-26-85
Time : 08;48
ARTHUR,I FIND SUPER GLUE VERY TASTY.
IT REALLY STICKS TO YOUR RIBS.
>>>BELBOZ<<<
Numb : 27
Title: K-w- you birdbrain!
From : ARTHUR DENT
Date : 09-27-85
Time : 17;54
You're lucky I super-glued your eyes
shut. Otherwise you'd have two black
ones. Look what you've done! You've
let them loose again!!!!!!
"!$!$%!%"15!%"!%"!%!"%!"%1256ruretbubru
RETURETBUtrue7%&'456754765RTu&856u54t6u
$%7rtu Bryan Hannahs %$'45TERU%$'euye$&
ERy567 (aka Arthur Dent) %$'658RTYJyity
&58tyriyrIYTITRYIytiyti76iYTI'&IIR'&ir7
ttTRIyriyti76i76iyTRI'&itryi'&i7r6itryi
P.S. You lousy bird brain!
Numb : 28
Title: As a matter of fact...
From : KIWI
Date : 09-27-85
Time : 04;06
Kiwis can hardly see, and instead rely on one of the best senses of smell of
any avian. I was able to read every word, you cowardly plankton!
Now as to you, Arthur Dent, you broke my +5 bill! And put the pieces over my
eyes, foolishly thinking you could get away with it! Where is the Sargent of
Arms of Blither? I think that's the Computist. You vandal! You visigoth!
(Whew, if you think these puns stink, just be glad you aren't a member of the
genus apteryx!) You get me a new one, and I mean NOW, and return it to me via
E-mail, or the Mexicans are finally going to test out that anti-matter bomb!
Kiwi
(n.b. lack of pole-arm)
Numb : 29
Title: Eureka!
From : KRILL
Date : 10-02-85
Time : 07;15
I'm rich!!! I'm rich!!! There's silver on that thar disk!!!
Get your hands off my silver, you greedy duck!
Hey everybody! Look at what I found while burrowing around the system!
SILVER
There's probably a whole lode of it here! Help me dig it up!
THE SILVER
Hmmmm... Doesn't look like there's any more in that direction, but not to
worry! There's probably tons of it in the other direction, and maybe some
gold, too!
THE SILVER ADEPT
Ahem... heh, heh... uh... well...
Sorry folks, it looks like I made a little mistake. Heh, heh... Uh... Sorry to
wake you all up. Eh... Sorry, Computist, I didn't mean to dig a hole in the
wall of your user file. I'll fix it right away. I'll get that duck to help me;
he's the one that got me into this mess.
Where did he go???!!! Well that rotten, good for nothing creature!
Hey rabbit!!! Where did that despicable friend of yours go??? Hey! I'm
talking to you! Come back!
Numb : 30
Title: Everybody run for your lives!
From : KIWI
Date : 10-03-85
Time : 23;09
Boy, Julio, I'm glad your tic-tac-toe board said not to use the antimatter
bomb to destroy Asarian, now we can use it to fix Arthur Dent for vandalizing
my +5 bill! Have you got the detonator hooked up yet? One post time delay?
Okay, Julio, get out of there while there's still time. I just hope your
tic-tac-toe board's calculations about the size of the blast are correct...
{*} (The anti-matter bomb from Today's Computers)
"!$!$%!%"15!%"!%"!%!"%!"%1256ruretbubru
RETURETBUtrue7%&'456754765RTu&856u54t6u
$%7rtu Bryan Hannahs %$'45TERU%$'euye$&
ERy567 (aka Arthur Dent) %$'658RTYJyity
&58tyriyrIYTITRYIytiyti76iYTI'&IIR'&ir7
ttTRIyriyti76i76iyTRI'&itryi'&i7r6itryi
(Note lack of signature; I'm getting
the hell out of here!)
Numb : 31
Title: ka-BOOM!!!
From : KIWI
Date : 10-03-85
Time : 23;12
* * * * *
* * * * * * *
* * * * * * *
* * * * * * * *
* * * * * * * *
* ******* *
***************************{*}*********
* ******* *
* * * * * * * *
* * * * * * * *
* * * * * * *
"!*!$%!%"15!%*!%"!*!"%!*%125*rure*bubr*
RETURETBUt*ue7%&*45675*765RT*&856u*4t6u
$%7rtu *ryan H*nnahs *$'45TE*U%$'eu*e$&
ERy5*7 (aka *rthur D*nt) %$'*58RTYJy*ty
&*8tyriyrI*TITRYIyt*yti76iYT*'&IIR'&i*7
ttTRIyri*ti76i76iy*RI'&itryi*&i7r6itry*
* * *
* * *
* * *
* *
* *
* *
K*ill *
* *
*
*
Numb : 32
Title: Oops!
From : KIWI
Date : 10-03-85
Time : 23;14
Oh no! Krill wasn't supposed to be there! He must've been digging around in
the system again and popped up to find out what all the commotion was. And
this time it wasn't his 'i' that was put out, it was his 'r'! I've created a
monster! Now, he's "Kill"! At least we won't have to worry about "Dnt",
except for the 'u', he's been disemvoweled, and I'll be able to defend
myself--I had my Mexicans get me a good deal on a new +5 bill.
|Kiwi
P.S. Grrr! That cheap Mexican labor got me a vertical bill instead of my old
horizontal one. I'll have to re-order.
Numb : 33
Title: Kill!!!
From : KRILL
Date : 10-04-85
Time : 03;03
Slay, shed blood, put to death, murder, assassinate, butcher, slaughter,
immolate, massacre, decimate, put an end to, dispatch, do to death, do for,
hunt, shoot, stab, saber, bayonet, put to the sword, strangle, garrote, hang,
throttle, choke, stifle, suffocate, smother, asphyxiate, drown, behead,
execute, guillotine, electrocute, burn, decapitate, crucify, impale, lynch...
Aaaaaargh!!! What's wrong with me?! I can't get my mind off these thoughts!
I've got to turn my mind to lighter things!
Injure, impair, damage, harm, hurt, spoil, mar, despoil, waste, overrun,
ravage, pillage, wound, stab, pierce, maim, lame, hamstring, mangle, mutilate,
disfigure, blemish, deface, warp...
Somebody help me!!!
K ill
Numb : 34
Title: BILL TRANSPLANTS
From : BELBOZ
Date : 10-04-85
Time : 08;25
KIWI,THERE IS A NEW FIELD OF MEDICINE
THAT DEALS WITH FIXING BROKEN BILLS.
OF COURSE IT WILL COST YOU SOME
BILLS OF YOUR OWN.(DOLLARS THAT IS)
THEY HAVE A WIDE SELECTION OF
DIFFERENT STYLES OF BEAKS,BILLS,&
NOSES. YOU CAN CHECK IN AND GET YOUR
BILL FIX,PLUS HAVE THEM CHECK YOUR
WINGS AND YOUR FEET.
>>>BELBOZ<<<
Numb : 35
Title: Nice try K-wi
From : ARTHUR DENT
Date : 10-04-85
Time : 14;05
Alright, fess up, who gave him the
super-glue remover?!!!
Anyway, you can never kill me (note
lowercase on next to last word before
left parenthesis), because I've got
character sets saved all over the
place on ROMs, EPROMs, EEPROMs, disks,
tapes, etc, etc, etc. I'll never run
out of characters to repair myself!!!
!"436$%'DRyeryteruTERUtrjtRUEtrutERUTER
RRButeru%u65U&%7%6urtyjRtjEtrsaTruItryJ
TEBUrtj Bryan Hannahs &%yuRTytiRTyi8r76
Tryiutry (aka Arthur Dent) %&856(FUityi
TRYuytriYtirrtyiTRyiyriYTityR6ri76ir'&i
ttyIUYir6Ir6i75ijqyytIrytriYRiyrIr76irr
P.S. Krill, my old friend, let us take
revenge on this bird-brain! We won't
let kim get away with what he did to
you!
P.P.S. No charge for the 'r'.
Numb : 36
Title: r
From : CAPTAIN SULU
Date : 10-04-85
Time : 20;05
Just think, if taking away one little
"r" could cause so much trouble, what
if they had got the "k" too?
Then he would be....
ILL!
This looks like a job for LETTERMAN!
Quick, somebody call "THE ELECTRIC
COMPANY"!!
Numb : 37
Title: LETTER MAN
From : ROAD MASTER
Date : 10-05-85
Time : 00;56
LOOK HERE HE COMES IT'S
LETTER MAN!!!!
TAKING THE TRUSTY 'K' OFF HIS KALVIN
KLINE SWEATER, HE CHANGES ILL BACK TO
KILL !
WHEREUPON KILL (ALIAS KRILL) TAKES
OUT TWO RECOILESS RIFLES AND KILLS
LETTERMAN!
- ROAD MASTER -
P.S. SOME BODY FIND AN 'R' AROUND HERE
SOMEWHERE! I DONT KNOW IF THE ONE FROM
DENT WILL WORK OR NOT! IF WE DONT FIND
AN 'R' SOON, WE COULD ALL BE DEAD.
P.P.S. MABEY I SHOULD HAVE MADE HIM
RILL INSTEAD OF KILL, BUT I DONT THINK
RILL IS A WORD SO I MADE HIM KILL SO
HE COULD EXSIST.
Numb : 38
Title: KILL!!!
From : KRILL
Date : 10-05-85
Time : 07;46
Hello, all you mortals (just how mortal, we shall soon find out - hee, hee,
hee), I have just returned from a visit with my dear friend, a Mr. Sade. We
discussed some very interesting techniques for removing gallbladders from
various living creatures. We... BLOOD!!! - oh excuse me... also discussed the
fine art of the removal of tonsils from humans without the slightest danger of
them surviving. Mr. Sade is such an interesting person, he told... OOZING OUT
OF THE - oh dear, please forgive that outburst... me about the first time he
cut the legs off of a cat. He was only three at the time. I guess he was sort
of a prodigy.
Well now that I am back, I have much work to do. Let's see... where is that
sniveling little rat-faced Dent that tried put that 'r' on me. We hates 'r's,
we do. They makes us small and defenseless, those horrid little 'r's.
Hmmm... We don't see that nasty little Dent anywhere. Heh, heh, heh... well
I'll just hide in this hole here until he comes along and then I'll rip his
'n' out and eat it whole!
@ @ @
=================== ========================
| |
| K |
| i |
| l |
| l |
---
P.S. Sorry about those piles of vomit outside my hole, something came over me
a few posts ago.
Numb : 39
Title: Rill
From : KIWI
Date : 10-05-85
Time : 14;49
According to my American Heritage Dictionary, a rill is "a small brook;
rivulet", or "any of various long, narrow, straight depressions on the moon's
surface". Maybe Kill is hiding in a rill?
Well anyway, the 'r' I ordered from the Mexicans came in. Since Kill seems
resistant to having it installed, I am going to have Julio round up the
Mexicans again and force it down his throat. They are going to wait outside
Krill's rill and hide behind the piles of vomit, waiting to ambush him. But
shhhhh! Don't tell Krill, or they'll lose the element of surprise.
#J@ DH@ @CM
=================== ========================
| |
| K |
| i |
| l |
| l |
---
J = Julio C = Carlos
H = Hernando M = Miguel
D = Diego # = The tic-tac-toe board
(You can't see the 'r' because it's in Julio's pocket.)
--Kiwi
P.S. My replacement replacement +5 bill came in, too.
Numb : 40
Title: What's that?!
From : KRILL
Date : 10-06-85
Time : 04;41
What is that? We hears something outside our hole! I hope that it's a Dent,
heh, heh, heh...
Hmmm... We don't see any Dentses. There's something fishy going on here.
Perhaps he saw my vomit and ran away. I guess I should clean it all up. Oh
no! Somebody's coming. I better hide!
#J@ DH@ @CM
=================== ========================
| |
| K |
| i |
| l |
| l |
---
Numb : 41
Title: Oops
From : KIWI
Date : 10-08-85
Time : 10;18
Julio: There he is, man! Let's get him!
Arthur Dent: Hey, you guys aren't so bad after all.
Mexicans:
Tic-Tac-Toe Board: Error.
Kiwi: (Just happening by) Oh no! Look what you guys've done!
Arrthur Dent: (Dazed) Ow!
Kiwi: (To Mexicans) You got the wrong guy! Now I'll have to order another
'r'! Funny yes, but that was not the mission! Arrthur Dent was already
harmless; Kill's the one whose face needs re-R-anging!
Mexicans: Groan!
Kiwi: (Makes a hasty exit. But before he is out of earshot, yells:) And quit
eating that vomit! We'll all go out to Taco Bell when you're done!
Arrthur Dent: (Staggers away.)
A #J@ DH@ @CM
=================== ========================
| |
| K |
| i |
| l |
| l |
---
--Kiwi
Numb : 42
Title:
From : KRILL
Date : 10-08-85
Time : 12;07
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz,
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz,
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz,
Huh?! What?! I thought I heard a Dent!
That's funny, I could have sworn I heard a Dent making horrible noises out
there. Oh well, I must have been just dreaming.
Boy, am I getting hungry! I just can't wait until I can get hold of that
Dent! Not only will I eat his 'n', but I will have his 'e' for desert, and I
think that I will have a spot of 't' with that, too.
Gosh, I'm getting so hungry that I almost can't stand it.
#J@ DH@ @CM
=================== ========================
| |
| K |
| i |
| l |
| l |
---
Numb : 43
Title: I love global delete
From : ARTHUR DENT
Date : 10-08-85
Time : 20;08
-----
:: ::
*** ***
@@ (nuke explosion) @@
=============== ===============
: D :
: e :
: a :
: d :
=====
$#76$%'45'4('%68&548uyTRuyRItyjkrTYI6R%
TYRiutyiTYIr6i&%Rir5I65ir%iyrIYtriYi%&7
$%74turt (Bryan Hannahs) $%'$#%YTUYTITY
ERU56RTU (aka Arthur Dent) #$6erbuRTDUT
ttERBUreturtuef58ER6uef%Uef5U&f5u&e5U6f
retuTRu&%eu56UteRDUrTBuERuerUebUrtIuRiR
Numb : 44
Title: I/O Error
From : KIWI
Date : 10-09-85
Time : 01;52
What does Arrthur think he's doing? He must've been so dazed from his most
recent encounter with the Mexicans that he mistook someone else's hole for
Kill's! Talk about blind with rage! (Note that the land around Kill's hole
starts on column 23 and ends on column 68, while the hole Arthur bombed starts
on column 1 and ends on column 33. Also, the walls in Kill's hole are lined
with the finest quality vertical bars, which Arrthur can't type--er--afford,
while the hole Arthur bombed was lined with cheap, surplus colons.) I wonder
who's hole it could have been? There's no "Dead" in Kill's hole; who on this
board keeps "Dead" in their hole? Oh, I know--Metallion! Yes, right on top
of his case of '@' signs (which has a leak, you know).
Everybody hear that? Arrthur Dent just nuked Metallion's home! And '@' signs
are spraying everywhere! Quick! Somebody call the Computist! A gusher!
@ @
@ @ @
D @ @ @ @
@ @e @ @ @ @ @ @
@ a @ @ @@ @
@ d @ @ @
@
@
@
=============== @ ===============
: @ :
: @ :
: @ :
: @ :
=====
--Kiwi
P.S. That's strange, those '@' signs look and smell just like the piles of
vomit outside Kill's hole.
Numb : 45
Title: LETTER BIGOTS
From : BLUE ADEPT
Date : 10-09-85
Time : 07;33
Say, are those of us without 'r's in
our handle safe here? Is this letter
bigotry going to end with r's?
Remember:
First they came for the r's,
and I stood by and watched.
Then they came for the @'s,
and I stood by and watched.
Then they came for me,
and no one stepped forward to help me.